February 2012
7 posts
very, very serious grievances
jaimeleigh:
If I have signed my name in an e-mail and you respond with it spelled totally differently you are the worst. I mean it. I know it’s a somewhat unusual spelling. I know! But that’s only an excuse if I haven’t already signed my name in the e-mail. Seriously.
Lilet and Lillit completely agree with this.
Yes, I know that to healthily cope with my depression I am supposed to be doing yoga and shit but I’m just going to be here with my DVDs and cookies and beauty products and turning into a giant fucking cliche.
“No one ever said the word “sex,” or even “vagina,” to me. We had no clue. We...”
– I Was a Hasidic Jew, But I Broke Free
3 tags
January 2012
19 posts
“1:03 a.m. At this point, Heigl does the impossible: handcuffed naked to her own...”
– ‘One for the Money’ Review
“Cured salted pork crafted as a nasal tampon and packed within the nasal vaults...”
– PORK CRAFTED AS A NASAL TAMPON is the best phrase of 2012 so far.
“I know everybody says their kids are their greatest achievement, and I think my...”
– Cynthia Nixon’s Life After ‘Sex’
“you fixed my squirrel traps this morning - m4m
you: a cute lil country...”
– Love you Raleigh Craigslist missed connections
“I read [pop-culture blog] Dlisted.com every day—anyone can say rude things, but...”
– Even Tina Fey respects the brilliance that is Michael K
“3. You’re a Slut.”
– Why You’re Not Married
So *that’s* it! THANKS HUFFPO!
(via rachelfershleiser)
Oh, and 6. You’re Not Good Enough.
Clownie crotch
Lilit: is it weird that i sort of want to buy a Hanukkah themed pad? http://judaicant.tumblr.com/
Me: I WANT IT TOO
Lilit: so awesome, right?! i wish i'd gotten it before the holidays
Me: i want to be like, yeah, i got a little jew up in my crotch, what with [my partner] being somewhat jewish, i think it would be funny!
Lilit: that's amazing. maybe you could get blue pubes to match!
Me: LOfuckingL. i am guessing [my partner] would freak out?
Lilit: oh come on, it would be hilarious
Me: oh, yes, but perhaps counterproductive, since i don't know if he'd lose his boner when confronted with blue hair and bloody lips
Lilit: that sounds like a demented clown
Me: it does!
Lilit: and i have an issue with clowns, so i can see how he might find that unsettling
Me: YES
“There’s still a legal stigma around copying for many. A lot of people still...”
– The Church of Kopimism Worships the Holy Spirit of File-Sharing
“Are you fluent in Italian? Is the person you’re speaking to fluent in Italian?...”
– How to Come Back from Vacation Without Being a Jerk
December 2011
21 posts
Things I Did for the First Time This Year
Put eyeliner on
Went to Australia
Saw an opera at the Met
Lived in sin
Had hummus in Abu Ghosh
Was on The Today Show
Snorkeled
Read George Eliot (and then couldn’t stop reading George Eliot)
Attended a bris
Won a beer-drinking contest on the Staten Island Ferry (related: it was the first time I attended a bachelorette party on the Staten Island Ferry)
Saw a show at the Public
...
“Movies in which married men sneak off to Korean massage parlors: “The...”
– The Best and Worst Movies of 2011
“In a new study in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, a Harvard...”
– - The Science of Why You’re a Hipster
I would have gladly accepted half the money spent on this study and just written an essay about my college friends.
“As an El Al plane landed at Ben-Gurion airport today, the voice of the captain...”
“As an aside: is anyone on TV bad at their jobs these days? Not if it’s a...”
– Kera Bolonik’s review of House of Lies in New York magazine
“The gay and lesbian community of Minnesota has issued a letter of apology to...”
– Every word of this is flawless.
“The lovable boy-next-door drummer from McFly was finally crowned Strictly...”
– BEST TRANSITION EVER.
The Douchiest Parts from this Scarlett Johansson...
“I used up all my subway tokens. It’s a privilege to not have to take the subway.”
[Regarding her hate of being called “ScarJo”] “”People can’t actually say the whole name? It’s just bizarre.” She tries shorthand sobriquets on other stars. How come Daniel Day-Lewis isn’t subjected to “like, ‘DaDay’? So Cate...
“Jewish girls are not pretty. They can be cute, or interesting, but not pretty.”
– Beginners
“There’s something sweet and wonderful about Christina Ricci. She’s...”
– So is this supposed to be a compliment? Also, who the fuck uses the word “noggin”?
- Why Pan Am Flies On While ‘The Playboy Club’ Crashed and Burned
A List of Christmas Songs I Like in Alphabetical...
1. Pogues, The: “A Fairytale of New York”
Dear lady at the deli,
You seem nice and all, but I don’t really think that “You’re probably not going to eat this whole sandwich, are you?” comment was necessary. And the “It’s a COMPLIMENT” when I didn’t smile and laugh at your comment was certainly not necessary.
Here’s the thing: we could have a whole conversation about body image and...
“Adele’s rider asks for the “very best quality red wine,” and 12 bottles of the...”
– http://gossip.thedailywh.at/2011/12/06/adeles-tour-rider-of-the-day/
November 2011
11 posts
The Good: My neighbor and her terrible boyfriend (who smoked in the hallway even after I told him I was allergic and liked to make passes at me when she wasn’t around) broke up, and she kicked him out.
The Bad: She’s recovering by listening to a back-and-forth assortment of sad Spanish-language love songs and “Moves Like Jagger.”
